Jack is a lifelong Robert Pattinson stan. He was in the trenches during the Twilight years and has since been vindicated as RPatz stars in multiple annual blockbusters and indie hits, and showcases his weird charm in press junkets or interviews where he pitches his ideas for portable pasta dishes.
Here’s his list.
1. Mickey Barnes – Mickey 17
Literally the MOST he’s ever appeared on our screens at once, there are 18 of him for heaven’s sake! He also manages to play both a lovable weirdo and a psychopath within the same film, fully completing the Pattinson spectrum of character archetypes.
2. Ephraim Winslow (Thomas Howard) – The Lighthouse
My personal favourite Rob. Peak Pattinson mania. Armed with a thick, gravelly New England accent (very Rob), he spends the movie screaming at seagulls, eating kerosene-soaked steak, and fighting Willem Dafoe. Pure feral energy.
3. Neil – Tenet
Smug but nice. Rob plays the silk-scarf wearing charmer with ease in Christopher Nolan’s intricate blockbuster of inverted time. He strolls through the narrative both backwards and forwards like he was on a casual European holiday.
4. Charlie Thompson – The Drama
Robert having a great time here, playing a polite, mild-mannered museum curator with a frantic and anxious about-turn to suit the film’s chaotic tonal shifts. It’s the best he’s been; probably not the most ‘Rob’ Rob, but a great performance.
5. Connie Nikas – Good Time
Chaos. This is the one where people started to notice the man behind the sparkles. Pattinson plays a low-level crook trying to bail his brother out of jail in a performance that can be characterised as ‘sweaty’.
6. Edward Cullen – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2
At this point in the series Rob was understandably quite tired of being the world’s favourite sparkly vampire and you can kind of tell, lending the performance some of his signature sardonic humor, almost rolling his eyes at the camera while delivering his lines.
7. The Dauphin – The King
Smug Robert rides again in this 2019 Shakespeare adaptation, stealing a few of Chalamet’s scenes with a blonde wig and a French accent worthy of a stripey top, garlic wreath and beret.
8. Bruce Wayne – The Batman
As established by the Twilight Saga, Robert Pattinson excels at brooding. And for his turn as Gotham’s crimefighting chiropteran (clever wordplay, Google it), he goes full basement-dwelling masochist. Classic Rob.
9. Antinous – The Odyssey
Here we see the most recent edition of a classic character for Rob: the arrogant/smug/smarmy type. Here he plays the villain you love to hate. Boisterous, cruel and completely dominant right up until archery hour.
10. Edward Cullen – Twilight
Making some bizarre choices in a performance as a romantic lead, this proto-Pattinson performance has it all: tortured facial expressions, angst filled exchanges and the iconic smelling Bella’s hair scene that started a franchise.